Tag Archives | family

What Would You Do if You Had One Month to Live?

What would you do differently if you only had one month to live? Would you change jobs or leave relationship? Would you apologize or be more caring to others? Would you take a risk you’ve always wanted to take? Everyone’s answer will be different. The book One Month to Live: Thirty Days to a No-Regrets Life by Kerry & Chris Shook can help you answer those questions and guide you along that journey of changing the way you live your life.

From the book:

“Be brutally honest with yourself. Your time on earth is limited. Shouldn’t you start making the most of it? If you knew you had one month to live, you would look at everything from a different perspective. Many of the things you do now that seem so important would immediately become meaningless. You would have total clarity about what matters most, and you wouldn’t hesitate to be spontaneous and risk your heart. You wouldn’t wait until tomorrow to do what you need to do today. The way you lived that month would be the way you wished you had lived your whole life.

If you knew you had one month to live, your life would be radically transformed. But why do we wait until we’re diagnosed with cancer or we lose a loved one to accept this knowledge and allow it to free us? Don’t we want all that life has to offer? Don’t we want to fulfill the purpose for which we were created? Wouldn’t life be a lot more satisfying if we lived this way?

I’m challenging you to start living your life as though you have one month to live, and I’ve designed this book to help you. There are four universal principles in the one-month-to-live lifestyle: to live passionately, to love completely, to learn humbly, and to leave boldly. I’ve divided this book into four sections or “weeks” accordingly, and I encourage you to live these next thirty days as if they were your last.”

I find this book to be fascinating, thought-provoking and inspiring. Happy reading! What will you do with your one month?

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4 Things You Need To Know About Your Core Values

Values2

“Core Values” is a term that’s thrown around a lot, especially in a business setting, but we have personal core values as well. It sounds more intimidating than it is. We all have them, whether we know it or not.

Our personal core values are our personal belief system, the way we filter our world, information, experiences, feelings, thoughts, etc. The way we walk, talk, believe and act, everything that happens in our lives.

Personal core values are developed mostly through life experiences and often other people install them in us knowingly or unknowingly – through either teaching, example or our rejection of them.

My personal core values are the filter of who I am.

Honesty, integrity, family, work ethic, money, health, fun, etc. Whatever they may be…every decision is guided by them. Unfortunately…or maybe fortunately…depending on your viewpoint…this is a major cause of conflict with other people who don’t share our values. It just is. Not bad, or good, just is.

Mini-Mission: 4 Things You Need To Know About Your Core Values

What are they? A Google search can help you identify and label…

How do you actively live them? Or do you actively ignore them?

Are your values congruent? Conflicting values make it impossible to thrive and grow.

Are they always open to change? We grow and change as we gather more life experience and so may our core values.

Something to think about

Your core values are who you are right now, not who you want to be. (Feel free to tweet that :) People tend to make lists of values, traits of the person they want to be…but if you aren’t actively living by them in the here and now, then they aren’t actually your values…now are they?

That thought was quite an eye opener for me…You mean

Your mission this week…Think about your personal core values…They are what drives your life, so they’re worth a bit of consideration. Consider the four questions above to help you get a better understanding.

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Mini-Mission: Know What You’re Committed To

Commitment

Have you ever given this question serious thought?

Some people are committed to their career, some their marriages, others children, perhaps a cause, their religion or spiritual beliefs, maybe being true to their inner selves, finding and serving their purpose, possibly having fun, avoiding conflict, keeping the peace, learning, fitness, health, and the list goes on and on…

This week’s Mini-Mission: Consider, Decide What are you committed to

Ponder this for a minute. One caution though, your first knee-jerk response may not be the truth…It may be what you think the truth “should be.” What you think you ought to be committed to, what others expect of you. Sit with that just for a moment. Wait until the answer really feels true. You aren’t going to broadcast this; it’s private, solely for your own personal awareness.

No guilt here, no expectations. The truth is the truth. And it may well be that there is more than one answer. We are complex creatures, it’s reasonable for us to be committed to more than one thing, but there’s usually some form of hierarchy or priority.

What if you say you’re committed to fitness, yet you don’t exercise regularly? Are you truly committed? Probably not. You purport to have a strong commitment to your career, but you have to drag yourself to work every day. That’s not commitment, that’s just something you have to do to pay the bills. And, that’s OK.

The value in asking this question, knowing what you’re committed to, helps to set your priorities in life and in your days. It also helps you to set better goals if you wish and more importantly to understand why you have difficulty changing habits in some areas more than others.

What you do with the answer is up to you. Start by asking the question. Ponder the answer. Do you wish the answer were different? Do you want to be more committed to certain things? Why aren’t you? What’s going on in that mind of yours?

If it’s a should and not a YES, accept that, acknowledge it. It moves down on the priority ladder for sure. That’s valid. That’s simply honoring your truth. On the other hand, if you truly want to increase your level of commitment in some area, ask yourself what it would take to up your commitment. Do you need to shift your thinking? Ask yourself if you can look at the situation in another way? Use some fresh eyes…

So, this week’s Mini-Mission: Consider, Decide What are you committed to

It’s a good one. Possibly life-changing.

Care to share? Leave a comment or share on our Facebook page!

(Just joining us… Find all of the Mini-Missions here…)

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5 Ways to Get the Most Out of Your Holiday

Christmas tree

Image via Wikipedia

When we look back on our fondest memories of Christmas past, it is probably not the perfectly trimmed tree and beautifully wrapped gifts that we most remember. It is rather those joyously happy, splendidly unplanned moments that were ripe with laughter (or tears,) family, friends and fun. It is the time spent helping others, connecting with those we love and embracing the good cheer of the festivities.

As the holiday fast approaches, it’s so easy to get caught up in the crazed busyness. Many of us have fallen victim to the pressures and pulls of the holiday chaos all around us, only to find that we have missed the entire meaning and joyousness of this special time. The gifts we cherish most are not the most expensive, but the most meaningful. The memories we hold dear are those filled with laughter and light.

Some suggestions to get the most out of your holiday:

Create Traditions – Whether it’s caroling or making snowmen, crafting gingerbread houses or baking cookies, volunteering or reading as a family it becomes so much more special if you make it a tradition. It’s often the simple things that are the most fun. Ask your children or family what they enjoy. Some of my children’s favorite traditions: Christmas layer cookies and wassail while we decorate the tree, answering questions from “The Christmas Conversation Piece” book, watching The Polar Express and the Grinch as a family and opening one gift on Christmas Eve.

Schedule Down-Time – Be selective about which social functions you attend. And don’t try to fit in too many family activities. Even well intended choices can become stressful if you don’t leave some time to unwind and just be together. I really cherish those evenings when we sit in front of the Christmas tree in our pajamas playing a game or watching Christmas movies.

Don’t Break the Bank – The biggest stress of the season can be the credit card bills that hit the mailbox in January. Don’t get tripped up by unrealistic spending. Stick to budget that you can handle, save ahead of time if you can and don’t make the mistake of thinking more expensive is better.

Forget Martha – I am not Martha Stewart and neither are you. Forget about perfection. Forget about making 12 kinds of cookies, expecting your home to look like a magazine and finding the perfect present for everyone on your list. Reality check. Martha has an entire crew to help her create and those homes in magazines are staged by professionals. Oh and those people on television who are always so elated with their gifts…they’re actors…

Have Fun – Most importantly don’t forget to have fun! Throw snowballs, make a snowman, dance and sing to your holiday favorites or visit Santa. Do whatever brings you joy and makes you feel like a kid again.

Make this the best holiday season ever!

What do you enjoy? Care to share a holiday favorite?

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Why Is Doing Nothing Harder Than Doing Something?

“Just Be.” It sounds like a new age song title or some new miracle happiness cure…

But really, it might just be the soundest advice we’ve ever been given. The problem is, it’s a cure that is nearly impossible for most of us to take.

In a culture that measures value and self-worth in productivity and accomplishment, the idea of “doing nothing” is discarded. Why do we view time as a black hole that must be filled? (Tweet worthy?) Even our rest, our leisure time must have a label, a tangible marker.

We choose to zone in front of the television, rather than sit quietly. We turn to the internet as diversion rather than taking in what’s around us. We turn on our iPods, instead of tuning in to our own inner musings.

We rush from one situation to the next, without pausing to reflect on what just happened. We move from one conversation to the next, without stopping to digest what was truly said, what was truly communicated.

We can’t wait for the weekend to come…and then we fill it. We say we need a vacation and then we cram our days so full of activity that we need to go back to work to rest.

We say we want to simplify, slow down, make more time for us, for family, for fun, but we look to accomplish this with a new program, a new technology, a new “strategy” adding yet something more to our lives.

We don’t know how to Just Be. We’ve forgotten how to lie in the sun, to sit in the chair and wonder at the antics of a ladybug, to meander the trails of our inner landscape, to simply watch the steam rise from our cup of coffee, to watch people pass without itching to go with them.

Can you remember the last time someone asked what you were doing and the answer was… “Nothing.”    

I’m afraid I can’t remember that far back. There might have been that time back in 1974…but it’s been so long, I’ve forgotten…

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