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Find the Reason…Find the Change…

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Everything we do, we do for a reason. We may not consciously be aware of that reason in the moment… or we may not want to see it, but make no mistake the reason is there.

I’ve gradually come to realize that if I really want to know how to make my life better I need to first take a little closer look at those reasons, the motivations behind my behaviors and habits.
What makes me tick? Why do I behave in a certain way… especially around certain people or in certain situations?

To be honest, some of my behaviors are quite puzzling to me. As I’m sure, some of yours are to you. But nothing intrigues me more than a good puzzle, especially a challenge that peaks my curiosity about the inner workings of the mind.

For instance:

Why do I instinctively deflect compliments?
Why do I always need to be right?
Why do I wear delayed gratification like a badge of accomplishment?

And so many more confounding personal and professional behaviors…

It’s a valuable undertaking don’t you think to get to know ourselves better? How can we hope to grow or make positive changes if we don’t first understand why we do what we do?

Your Mini-Mission: Look for the Reason

When you find the reason…then you will find the path to change. (Feel free to Tweet that!)

Your thoughts? Do you know why you do what you do? Leave a comment or share on our Facebook page.

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The Quickest Way To A Better Life…

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Let’s talk about gratitude. A big idea and an important one.

Feeling gratitude triggers a state of mind that exudes peace and wellbeing. From this place of gratitude things just seem to flow a bit easier. Life seems a bit lighter…even if we are in the midst of difficult times.

Mini-Mission: Focus On Gratitude

Take time every day to focus on the things you are grateful for, tangible and intangible. Ideally being grateful would be a constant companion in your day, but sometimes life doesn’t lend itself to the ideal.

At the very least, take a few minutes each day to write down several things you’re grateful for…or simply contemplate them during a few minutes of quiet if you prefer.

Consider the things that you rarely stop to notice, that you typically just take for granted.

Consider the people in your life – both significant and passing – people who give your life meaning and bring joy. Sometimes I am just grateful for a pleasant cashier…

Consider experiences that you have had – both positive and challenging – that have affected your life in a positive way or perhaps have taught you lessons.

Consider the fundamental things that you would have difficultly living without, the big things that make your life livable, comfortable, that allow you to function.

Consider the things that you enjoy, that brighten your life in some way – fun, passion, hobbies, vacations, indulgences, pleasures, spiritual pursuits.

There are so many things in life to be grateful for…It shouldn’t take long to come up with a few each day. Gratitude brightens your mood, shifts your focus, lowers your stress level and puts you back in touch with your life. (Feel free to tweet that :)

Some days I am grateful to just have woken up to another day and still be breathing…but then I remember that I have a home and food and heat and people who love me and music and books and a good cup of coffee and…I am grateful.

Do you have a gratitude practice of some kind?

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4 Things You Need To Know About Your Core Values

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“Core Values” is a term that’s thrown around a lot, especially in a business setting, but we have personal core values as well. It sounds more intimidating than it is. We all have them, whether we know it or not.

Our personal core values are our personal belief system, the way we filter our world, information, experiences, feelings, thoughts, etc. The way we walk, talk, believe and act, everything that happens in our lives.

Personal core values are developed mostly through life experiences and often other people install them in us knowingly or unknowingly – through either teaching, example or our rejection of them.

My personal core values are the filter of who I am.

Honesty, integrity, family, work ethic, money, health, fun, etc. Whatever they may be…every decision is guided by them. Unfortunately…or maybe fortunately…depending on your viewpoint…this is a major cause of conflict with other people who don’t share our values. It just is. Not bad, or good, just is.

Mini-Mission: 4 Things You Need To Know About Your Core Values

What are they? A Google search can help you identify and label…

How do you actively live them? Or do you actively ignore them?

Are your values congruent? Conflicting values make it impossible to thrive and grow.

Are they always open to change? We grow and change as we gather more life experience and so may our core values.

Something to think about

Your core values are who you are right now, not who you want to be. (Feel free to tweet that :) People tend to make lists of values, traits of the person they want to be…but if you aren’t actively living by them in the here and now, then they aren’t actually your values…now are they?

That thought was quite an eye opener for me…You mean

Your mission this week…Think about your personal core values…They are what drives your life, so they’re worth a bit of consideration. Consider the four questions above to help you get a better understanding.

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What The Heck is Going On?

 

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Do you ever wonder what the heck is going on? What’s happening in our world? One crisis after another – Just look at the morning paper, our country is in yet another financial crisis, one of the oldest religious institutions in the world has no leader, millions of people are unemployed, and our health as a nation is declining with stress becoming a national epidemic. The future we envision for our children is not so rosy…

And yet, despite all of the uncertainty and hardships and challenges we face, a feeling of hope, of expansion, of growth and resilience still survives. We can do better, we can find answers, we can move forward into the future with a sense of optimism and wonder. We haven’t lost that…at least I hope we haven’t. I certainly haven’t.

There’s always a sense of something more…the possibilities of what we can do with our lives, the desire to grow and strive, to be happier, to come alive, to accomplish something worthwhile, to be, do and have more than where we are today…

Wherever we are in our lives, whatever that “more” means to us personally…it’s what drives us more than anything else I think. It’s definitely what drives me.

So, your mission, maybe more than any other mission I’ve given you, is to ask yourself…

Mini-Mission: What is my more?

Who do I want to be that I’m not right now?

What do I want to do that I’m not doing right now?

What do I want to have or experience in my life that I don’t have right now?

 

Take some time to think about your anwers to those questions? What is you own personal “more?”

Your thoughts? I’d love to know what you think! Leave a comment or share on our Facebook page!

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Mini-Mission: What Are Your “Signs of Wear?”

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So funny… I was just thinking about this last night, pondering whether I should write a post about this topic, then Hello! This morning I read a post by Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project discussing the very same idea… It’s fate…

Gretchen calls them “Broken Windows,” I call them my “Signs of Wear” those signs that my life is getting out of control. They signal some fraying at the edges of my life, some unraveling, overwhelm, disorder, overstretching, stress mounting, health damaging. Signs that I’m wearing thin. We all have them, many of us ignore them.

My “Signs of Wear” that scream Hello! Pay attention. Slow down. Get a grip.

  • Forgetting to feed my fish that sits 5 feet from my desk
  • The “OMG I’m supposed to have dinner ready in 10 minutes and I have no idea what to make”
  • Skipping lunch
  • Still working in my pajamas when my son comes home from school
  • Overdue library books (It means I’ve had no time to read for weeks)

 

Some other common signs (contributed by my cohorts)

  • Overflowing laundry
  • Unsorted mail
  • Piles of paper
  • Frequent take-out
  • Unmade bed
  • Missed appointments

The sky isn’t falling. Life’s busy. Stuff happens. We all fall prey to overwhelm and over-stress sometimes.  It doesn’t mean we’re failing or falling apart. It just means we need to pay attention and get a grip. It may mean something needs to go. It may mean we need help. It may just mean we need a break…but it definitely means we need to pay attention.

Mini-Mission: What are your “Signs of Wear?”

How do you know when your life is starting to get out of control?

Leave a comment or share on our Facebook page.

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